As a well-trained counselor, the author has experienced the gap between western knowledge and Chinese cultural, and started to study Confucianism in order to integrate oriental wisdom into counseling theory. During the process of this engagement, the inner conflict from the belief of Christ troubled the author that push the author reflected on his own experiences of God and re-understanding the historical events of gospel movement in China in 19^(th)-20^(th) century. The article is written by the form of narrative inquire and has presented Confucianism way of Counseling, introspect the religious conflict not only personal experiences but also social history.